My Wife and Guns

It’s simple math, really.

Gun>no gun.

Rambo+gun=Four movies of badass shit.

But wife+gun>Rambo+gun.

That’s saying a lot, because I dig the Rambo series.

My wife is an Atheist, I’m a Catholic. She’s pro-choice, I’m not (and I’m NOT going to get into that right now). She thinks Trump is the Devil (well maybe not that, because she’s an Atheist, but you get the idea), I think Trump is just obnoxious.

But we do agree on a few things: one of those things being guns.

Back before I knew how she felt about firearms (or me), we were watching Star Wars Episode I in her apartment one night (turns out there was another thing we agree on: Episode I was NOT George Lucas’s finest hour).

Suddenly she looked up.

“Did you hear that?” She asked.

“Hear what?” I said. (translation: no)

She leapt up, ran over to her dresser and pulled the top drawer open.

And what do you suppose she grabbed out of the drawer?


Then she ran to the front door and put her eye to the peep hole.

My reaction:

A woman who likes guns and watches the Star Wars prequels just to make fun of them? Sign me the fuck up!

She looked over at me like I was an idiot.

“What’s with you?” She asked.

“You have a fucking gun?! That is AWESOOOOOOOOME!” I replied.

We got married the following year 😊

Unfortunately she doesn’t share my enthusiasm for Rambo movies, but I’ll live.

2 thoughts on “My Wife and Guns

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