Wolfpack Blues

Warning: strong profanity to follow.

Oh yeah, NC State’s playing on Thursday.

Against Wake Forest.

On Senior Night.

No way the Wolfpack will screw this up, right?

That’s a big fat fucking no, Bob!

27-23, Wake Forest.

The Wolfpack up 23-20, with less than a damn minute to play, all they had to do was play defense.

No, scratch that. All they had to do was PRETEND to play defense.

But. Then. They. Didn’t.

No big deal, just 14th-ranked State blowing shit all over the field against a 4-5 Wake Forest team WITH A BACKUP QUARTERBACK.

No big deal, just another Senior Night letdown by the Wolfpack.

I had to listen to Matt AND Tim Hasselbeck cum in their pants over how well Wake Forest was playing for the first three-and-a-half quarters…and how not well State was playing.

Then, for the first time in my life, I muted a football game.

That’s how fucking irritating the Hasselbecks were with their bullshit commentary. I HAD TO MUTE THE GAME.

And that Flemming guy who was with them in the broadcasting booth? He looks like he carries roofies in his back pocket.

Sorry, not sorry (but really, I’m kinda sorry).

I should be used to this by now. State often has high expectations for their football team, only to end up fucking themselves with that oven mitt Phyllis knitted for Michael Scott in season 2 of The Office.

But you know what? It still hurts.

State was well on its way to playing in a New Years bowl game before tonight, but now? They’ll be lucky to get back to the fucking Sun Bowl.

I might call out of work tomorrow.

Now I know how Democrats felt when Beto O’Rourke lost to Ted Cruz.

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