Pampers to Introduce Avengers-Themed Adult Diapers for Upcoming Film

Marvel fans who are excited for Avengers: Endgame, but nervous about the 181-minute runtime, can breathe a sigh of relief.

In preparation for the upcoming film, Pampers is releasing Marvel-themed, adult-size diapers for any moviegoers who don’t want to miss a moment of the action.

Pampers spokesperson Peter Holdin told reporters that he had been waiting for years to introduce the product, but previous Marvel movies weren’t long enough to justify it.

“The movie is supposed to be three hours long,” Holdin said, “that’s a long time to go without a bathroom break. But Pampers is going to save you from having to consider that.”

“You’ll be able to have your favorite Marvel character on them, too. Iron Man, Thor, Hulk, Captain Marvel, you name it.”

Kat Hensyn, a Marvel fan, said she was excited about the new diapers.

“I don’t want to miss a second of Endgame,” Hensyn said. “I’ll get a pair with Captain America on it, so I can finally sit on Chris Evans’s face.”

Tyler Hud, another Marvel fan, said he wanted Black Widow, played by Scarlett Johansson, on his.

“It’s a dream come true,” Hud said. “I’ve always had this fantasy where I get to pee on Black Widow. And I get to do it while watching Avengers: Endgame? Sign me up.”

Not everyone is excited about the product, though.

Biff McGriff, manager of the AMC Theatre in Durham, said he was worried that excessive diaper wearers could mean odious crowds.

“I can understand not wanting to miss the movie,” McGriff said, “but imagine 50 different people in the same theater with diapers. Yuck.”

Avengers: Endgame is scheduled for release on April 26.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s