Cheaters: The Canine Files

One of my favorite things about being a pest control technician is meeting new customers. Oh wow, did I just type "meeting new customers"? I meant to type "meeting new customers' dogs" 😉. Because dogs are fun, sweet and ADOWABOWL! People are not. I don't know if my dogs, Miles and Crackers, appreciate me meeting … Continue reading Cheaters: The Canine Files

Elizabeth Warren Should’ve been a Pirate

The biggest mistake Elizabeth Warren ever made was claiming to have Native American ancestry. I'm sorry, but Native Americans have been through enough over the last several centuries without having to worry about a white politician claiming to share their genealogy. Okay, that's not really fair, because for all I know maybe Warren DOES have … Continue reading Elizabeth Warren Should’ve been a Pirate

Waffle House Grits, aka Culinary Napalm

Well, my paycheck was significantly higher than I expected. You know what that means? Spluuuuuuurge city! You know, wiping my ass with dollar bills at the Waffle House 🎉. Don't tell Boo-Thang, but for breakfast this morning I really burned a hole in my pocket. That's right, the grits were on me 😉. I ordered … Continue reading Waffle House Grits, aka Culinary Napalm